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Writer's pictureJoy Osahon

If You Blame God For Your Dating Experiences, Consider These 3 Things



We can all agree that dating is not always an easy experience. In fact, for many people, it has felt like a roller coaster ride that seems to never stop. This can sometimes lead an individual to take their frustrations out on God. If that is you in this stage of your life, then keep on reading.


1. God Gives Us Free-will


God is loving and really does care for His children but He does not force us to do anything. Even if your back is against the wall with warning signs that God has shown you; He still would not force you to do what He wants you to do.


Have you ever taken a moment to pause and reflect on your previous dating experiences? If not, I suggest you take a moment to reflect and ask yourself this question,

"Was I operating from a place of knowledge or from a place of wisdom?.”

Being knowledgeable about something is never enough because it does not lead to changed behaviors. The truth of the matter is that wisdom is what makes a person leave a situation after seeing several red flags from another individual.


When failed dating experiences have occurred for some, there may have been knowledge of someone's toxic red flag but emotions got in the way so it was overlooked. Hence why many people see those flags as "pink".


Unfortunately, there are people who are blaming God for something they do have control over; and that is walking away.


2. Do You REALLY Love Yourself?


Naturally, we protect what we love and value the most, and here are two examples of how folks do that in their day to day.

  • When someone buys a new pair of shoes, they treat them with extra special care by cleaning their shoes regularly or being extra choosy about where they wear them to.

  • When a person buys their dream car, they assign rules to upkeep the maintenance of their car by not allowing eating or drinking to occur.

As you can see, how one treat the things that matter the most to them is often met with boundaries and high expectations.

When you actually love yourself, you will have a difficult time allowing someone to love you any less. As cliche as the "self-love" movement may sound, it is very essential when it comes to dating.


When you do not love really love yourself, you have no clue what loving and handline you look like because you are unsure of what the standard is.


You cannot expect someone to handle you with care if you are not handling yourself that way first.


3. You May Be Dating From a Place of Desperation.


Dating from a place of desperation can look like the following things:

  • Throwing away your core values (non-negotiables) for the sake of having a person's attention

  • You are afraid to verbalize what you need or what you are looking for

  • You make every excuse to stay with a person, when every reason why you should not be with them, is presented to you

  • You dim your light to make that individual feel comfortable



The reality of dating is that every decision we make in the process will have an outcome of some sort. Some outcomes may be beneficial while some may be consequential. That consequential outcome is not a representation of God but a representation of our own free will.





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