top of page


A woman’s worse nightmare is not just having a bad hair day but having it after leaving a hair salon.

There is a level of high expectation we as women have for hair stylists. We expect greatness and will not settle for less than that.

Unfortunately, I found myself settling 3 times!

Being in a new state is a great experience filled with growth but it is challenging when it comes to trying trying new things such as restaurants, barber shops, nail salons, hair salons and more.

Back in Connecticut, there were friends who would hook my scalp up such as Barbara, Vania and Krystal to name a few. I trusted them and was very comfortable to voice my wants and concerns with them.

However, I did not experience that same opportunity these past 2 weeks. These past 2 weeks have been horrible and stressful pertaining to my hair. I went from stylist to stylist for a full head sew in weave. With each encounter I was left unsatisfied.

This post is not to bash the salons I went to but to showcase that through our frustrations and disappointments, our true selves is revealed.

We sometimes get so caught up in the mess that we look past how WE can grow and learn from it. It does not matter how big or small our mess is; there is an opportunity to learn.

I learned 3 things these past 2 weeks during the trial of getting my hair done.


I found that as I was sitting in the salon chair I verbally stated what I wanted but I did not speak up on it!

When you speak up on a manner as it pertains to your expectations, you feel so strongly that no one can sway your words. You will begin to talk as if you are an expert so your tone is filled with confidence and assurance. I knew exactly what I wanted my hair style to be and how I wanted it to look like.

However, I did not speak up the way that I should have. My inability to speak up led to the braiding patterns not being done the way that I wanted it to be, the lack of fullness that I desired my hair to have and my scalp literally aching with pain.

I let the voice of the stylist over ride my voice. That eventually cost me my time and money to be wasted.


I spent an average $120 with each stylist and I had 3 people touch my head. Do the math and you will see why my heart aches lol.

More is not always a guaranteed that quality service will be attained. Although, many times you will get your money worth but in my situation I experienced the opposite. My expectations were not met and I automatically assumed it would be due to the price. The level of assumption I made was solely based on cost and other factors were not taken into consideration.

I have friends back home in Connecticut who normally may charge me under $100 dollars for a style and my hair would come out more than amazing. That led to my satisfaction and eagerness to showcase the masterpiece.

This whole ordeal was a wake up call that reminded me that the best of the best does not always mean that my pockets will have to hurt. It’s all about quality not quantity. It may seem like kindergarten knowledge right!?

I am not saying that those who are expensive have no right to be. There is a level of skill and time that one must be compensated on. However in my case, I was quick to jump the gun because the price tag seemed to justify credibility.


The process of searching for a stylist in the area was not long nor drawn out. When going off of an assumption, we tend to settle quickly. We question less and accept more. That was the very case that occurred with my hair failure.

I opted out from asking specific questions because I just wanted my bundles installed. If I had taken my time, I would have asked not only the stylists specific questions but I would have asked my friends out here in NJ who they would recommend.

These past 2 weeks of having a headache of my hair issues could have been prevented. How!? If I had just listened to that tugging of my heart telling me to keep looking or not this one joy, then I would have had the pleasure of sitting in only 1 chair with out the hassle.

I’m sharing this all for you to realize that that our storms, chaos and headaches is not only an opportunity to point the finger at others. It is an opportunity to self reflect to see what and how you played a role, good or bad. These past 2 weeks showed me more of who I am as a person with a voice and how much more confidence I need to attain pertaining to my wants and needs.

This may sound crazy to some, but the time and money wasted with this ordeal was truly an investment towards becoming a stronger Joy.


bottom of page